Come on Baby, Light my Fire!
As you’ll start to notice, I go back and forth with my dating regime. I’ll serial date, then quit cold turkey. Soon after, something happens and I always wind up meeting someone by accident and taking a chance.
Enter John, the Firefighter. John is a weird case, because from the get-go there was a ton of physical chemistry. In some respects, even though we had met a few times, I figured when we actually went on a “date” there would be nothing to say. Most of the time was spent drooling over his arms, back, abs…butt…you get the point.
Turns out he is actually quite smart, genuine and all around appeared to be a nice guy. I didn’t want to sound like a jerk, but I had to ask…
Me: “Why on earth are you single? You’re a firefighter, you have perfect teeth and eyes I’d love to dive into. Help me understand!”
He went on to compliment me before saying that he just usually meets “trash,” which is why he’s always hesitant to meet people in bars.
He went on to say he rarely drinks, watches TV, etc and is also not an overly obnoxious health nut. John seemed relatively perfect…potential mythical unicorn material! Typically that means…there’s a catch!
We spent five hours at a Starbucks, with a constant flow of conversation. It might have been the first time I’d felt a genuine connection with anyone in a long…long…LONG time.
There was a guy who sat down quite some time after we’d been there, and he was an older guy who set up a laptop, mouse pad and some intricate looking mouse for “people who are serious about doing computer work.” He was sitting on John’s side, and periodically, I’d see John’s eyes wander over to the screen. He’d laugh, look back and mouth “oh..my…GOD” to me. Eventually the dude next to us went inside and I asked, “What’s so funny??”
He replies, “The guy next to us is playing World Of Warcraft!” I laugh, and he looks at me and gets very serious…
“Hey, this isn’t your dad, is it?”
“What? NO, that’s not my Dad.”
“I’m just saying, that would be super clever. Like he was here to make sure I was a good dude, and make sure his little girl is ok.”
“I can assure you…that’s not my Dad.”
“Ok…” And he lets it go. Temporarily.
“He’s really looking at me funny…” he says.
The guy can’t hear him because he’s wearing industrial sized headphones.
“John honestly…I can’t make you believe it’s not my dad if you think it is.”
“No no no…you’re right. He’s probably not.”
The conversation went on, and as the night was coming to a partial close/relocation as Starbucks was closed for over 2 hours now and it was only us…and this guy. I decided that since John had already picked up on my humor, and we were sort of already in the “easy part” of the date, I’d mess with him…because that’s the mature, caring individual I am.
“Are you ready to get out of here?”
“Yes, it’s best…it’s 12:30 and the only other person here is this guy,” I say.
“Don’t worry, I’d protect you,” he says with a smile.
“Oh that won’t be necessary,” I reply as we stand up.
“Have a good night kids,” the guy says, indicating he’s probably been able to hear us the WHOLE time.
“GOODNIGHT, DAD!” I look back and yell. The guy was momentarily confused, John went completely ghost white, and I had a good laugh. The way I see it…everyone won!
I Give It A Yikes! 